The mindset of me, myself, and I has driven me crazy, but lately it seems to be more so within the context of FFXIV. I had noticed this problem before a friend talked to me of a situation with her problems as a healer. It is the same pretty much in any MMO; if shit goes down then its usually the healer’s fault. Sometimes the healer and the tank switch positions, but rarely is the blame placed on the DD (unless they do something really stupid). Though sometimes it IS a single person’s fault, people need to check themselves first before they accuse the healer of doing a shitty job. As a former healer, it is incredibly difficult to dodge AoEs, maintain HP of your allies, maintain your MP and enmity, and also maintain your own HP if you so happen to derp. What makes it worse is if the tank is taking too much damage because of either poor gear, has poor rotation, doesn’t use correct abilities, isn’t tanking in the right spot, etc. There is also the DD who can also be too under geared, has poor rotations, doesn’t move out of AoEs in time, etc. A healer can’t correct someone’s stupidity and even I get offended when someone pins the damn blame on the healers. On the flip side, a healer can’t blame everyone else if they are pulling too much enmity to throw the mob off and make shit go bonkers.
I see it as a triangle. An equilateral triangle (three equal sides, three equal angles, all at 60 degrees) is the perfect setup; healer, tank, and DD work cohesively and together to make things go smoothly. You can sometimes limp along well if you have an isosceles triangle (two equal sides, two equal angles), because you have at least two people trying to support the third one. All hell breaks lose, however, when you have a scalene triangle (nothing is equal) and you have maybe one party pulling the weight of two.
This is why the Duty Finder is sometimes very frustrating for me; a decked out WHM can’t expect a lesser geared tank to hold hate when they go nutso on the spells and abilities. Conversely, if the tank doesn’t know what abilities to stun and when or how to use Provoke… you can bet I’ll be wanting to fling curse words in your direction. And for the DD who don’t bother to make sure their gear is in check or who thinks their relic+1 automatically makes them awesome? Check your rotations, check your positioning, and for crying out loud please pop in some food into your mouth flap. Yes there are shouts that ask for relic only, but those are typically speed runs. For typical clears, the runs can be accomplished by having appropriate gear choices. Everyone starts from somewhere but if you’re pulling into the Keep with Item Level 39 gear, then you might need to assess what needs to be fixed and how. Gear can be cheap, and upgrades are a plenty if you go to Wanderer’s Palace before hitting up Amdapor Keep. It isn’t gear snobbery to expect appropriate gear or to at least get your head out of your damn ass; its being respectful to the other people who are also wasting their time and energy to get what people collectively need as a party.