I am a fickle person. Want proof? Ask Derrick/Orophen how many domain names I have owned in the past or how many times I have changed my mind on ONE thing. The man is a saint, I tell you. I should know. He deals with me.
I am not here to write about my boyfriend though. As wonderful as he is, he is hardly the problem I am having. My problem is obviously about blogs and anxiety, but how do they mix? I’ll tell you: I have too many of them!
See, part of me had always thought it was a good idea to have several blogs: one for microblogging, one for posting stupid shit, one for personal, one for private matters, another for gaming, and then another for… some weird FFXIV stuff. Taking aside the microblogging one (twitter), that is five blogs in total. Of those five, one has been active as of late (oh, hey, that is this one!). The other four? Errorcode.me has been lacking things to write in because I just haven’t had the time to game or anything. If I do game, then I am too busy just derping around and I’m not sure it warrants me writing about it. I own a tumblr for reblogging or favoriting silly things on there, and it also acts as a secondary “personal” blog. This is my primary personal blog, and I still maintain a Livejournal account for private entries and to keep up with old friends from Livejournal. The last one is so straight forward, that I think it doesn’t need any explanation at all.
Why did I decide to have so many? I don’t know. In my head, I keep thinking, “This doesn’t belong here! It should be on its own… HERE!” and then it snowballs from there. But now I have a problem. I’m stretched too thin and I am also keenly aware that maybe people don’t want to visit two or three or maybe four blogs. So, guess what I bought? calaera.me meant as a portal to everything else.
Here I am days later, however, and I am now having an anxiety attack because I am realizing that it is too damn much. I could technically merge errorcode.me and calaera.me together. I could also make a concerted effort to repost things onto tumblr so that people who have tumblr don’t have to bother searching me up if they actually cared to read my stuff (and I am fairly sure not many do). But I am about convenience and options, so reposting things on tumblr makes sense to me.
I honestly don’t know what to do. I like it separated, but I don’t. I like knowing that people don’t have to bother reading crap if they don’t want to, but then I have to keep switching between blogs and being mindful of the existence of the other blogs so that they don’t fall completely to the wayside.
Or, to make things easier on myself and possibly everyone else, I could just stop blogging. Problem solved on many different levels, and I can have some sort of sanity back. Until I find myself longing to write about post my ridiculous diatribe online…